Parenting Posts

The Scariest Thing That Happened to our Kids

Our kids are old enough to be home alone while we are out for short periods of time. We bought them a kid-friendly phone to have in case they need to reach us. Earlier this week, Michelle and I came home to our kids telling us an alarming story.

A few of them were playing an online game called “Among Us.” The game randomly pairs people together and includes a chat feature. In the game chat that night, one of the people they were playing with started to tell one of my kids that they were hot (they can’t see their appearance in the game). She said her name was Ashley and that she was a thirteen-year-old girl. In the chat of the game, she gave my kids her cell phone number and said to text her when they were done playing the game. Thinking they were making a new friend, they did.

When we got home our kids knew something about this didn’t feel right and handed over the phone. I read through the text exchange for myself. Here are a few highlights that stood out to me:

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How Many Kids Should You Have?

Sometimes I read a blog post by someone else that is so well written I want everyone I know to read it. So I do the next best thing and post a link to it on my blog. Below you’ll find a link to a post from a mother with five kids who answers the question: “Don’t you have enough kids already?” Her thoughts are amazing.

When people say to me, “Don’t you have enough kids already?” the assumption is that I am somehow unfulfilled by the number of children in my home now. I need more children in order to be happy, and isn’t that selfish and irresponsible of me?

Why on earth would I want more?

The simple answer is, I don’t want more kids.

Click here to read the post. Prepare to be moved.

Intentional Living

Here’s a video we shot for TheIntentionalLife.com about our experience as foster parents.

Thank You, Dad

If you watched any of the Olympics the last few weeks you likely saw an inspiring commercial from P&G called “Thank You, Mom.” I love the premise behind the commercial but I cringe at the conclusion. The premise is that behind all of the success we watch at the Olympics are the hero moms. I realize this is likely true the majority of the time. And I’m grateful for all of those moms.

But the obvious issue is that we need more dads to fill this role.

Moms shouldn’t be carrying the responsibility by themselves. It saddens me to think of how these types of videos add to the already deep perception of deadbeat, nonexistent dads. It’s time we offered encouragement to the dads out there to step up and play their part.

So if you had a dad who was present, who gave you encouragement, who helped you become the person you are today… I encourage you to tell him thanks. You were one of the rare blessed ones. I know that I was in this category and I’ve never lost sight of how much my dad challenged me to become the person I am today.

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Initial Thoughts with a Foster Child

Here's little Adelyn meeting the new baby for the first time.

Here’s little Adelyn meeting the new baby for the first time.

Last Tuesday Michelle and I received our first foster placement. We have been unbelievably blessed to invest ourselves in the life of a beautiful baby boy. Here are a few of the highlights of our experience so far, both the good and the bad.

Secrecy is bizarre, and even feels a bit cruel.

With foster kids you also adopt an interesting set of rules. We can’t show his face publicly (which is why you see the very selective camera angles in our pics). We can’t share his name publicly. And we can’t tell anyone (even our other family members) his story before ending up in our home. It is very odd to have such a major part of your life with the coupling of strict secrecy to go with it.

People often struggle with the concept of fostering but not with the actual children.

Before we got our little guy it often felt like people wanted to talk us out of doing this. We’d get comments like:

  • “Are you sure you are ready for this?”
  • “Your kids are so young already.”
  • “We could never do something like that.”

You walk away from these conversations second guessing yourself and feeling a little bit crazy. Clearly we aren’t thinking through this the way everyone else is. The result was that we were slightly nervous to see how people would react once we brought a child into our home. We couldn’t have been more pleasantly surprised. My Facebook post announcing the new arrival garnered nearly 500 “likes” and almost 100 comments. While you might argue that those types of metrics on social media are superficial, I can honestly say that it felt like a tremendous vote of support from a lot of people.

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Number11dad.com

Number 11 Dad logo

I’m so excited to officially announce a project that has been in the works for a few months now. One of my passions is to challenge and encourage guys to lead their family as the best husband and father they can be. To strategically address that we’ve just launched number11dad.com to be a resource for dads. Here’s what the name means:

“It’s okay not to be number 1, but number 11 is where I draw the line.”

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